Just need to come to Jesus or maybe end this …

 

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Yesterday was my breaking point in a lot of things in my life especially concerning my friends and with my significant other.  I want to say boyfriend but I do not know how long that label will last.  So, as you can see from my blog I have not posted a ton about online dating or dating in general.  That is because I have gotten bored and frustrated with the online dating.  Also, I began dating the guy I am seeing now.  It has been going well but lately  things have been going downhill.  There have been little red flags popping up and things have not improved.  The guy and I live a distance apart (40 mins. ) but for me it is not enough to qualify as a long distance relationship.  I have been putting in effort to make things work by visiting him, not being put as priority in his life, seeing him only once per week (btw it sucks), dealing with his major health issue in the beginning of our relationship, and just putting up with stuff that maybe I shouldn’t have such as never talking on the phone with me and hardly planning dates anymore.

My mistake is not speaking up enough. Now, there is this lump in my stomach that this is the end of the road and I am seriously thinking that it is time for us to part ways.  But  I need to give one last ditch effort to see if it’s me blowing things out of proportion.  So, in the tradition of my family it is time for me to have the come to Jesus talk with him.  I need to say what I need to say and see how he feels.  If it doesn’t work it doesn’t work.  There are more fish in the sea and I am done wasting my time and putting in effort for someone who doesn’t reciprocate.

We are either going to fix things during this come to Jesus talk or its done and we part ways.  What sucks even more is that this is all going to be happening over the weekend that I get to celebrate just me and it sucks. For the record he didn’t remember my birthdate.  He could have been sly and been pretending to not remember so that I will not suspect what he had planned.  But I honestly think he didn’t remember the exact date which for me is a red flag.  I don’t want this come to Jesus to happen this coming weekend but I do not want to prolong things to the week after.  But I just need to grab the bull by the horns because I cannot go another week without having this talk.  It’s eating me up inside.  This is just another reason why I should stay single because guys just suck and do not truly care.  Well some do but most I met have not.  Let’s hope this come to Jesus talk works and I can work on fixing things or just peacing out of this relationship.  In some ways I was probably better being single in the first place.

Any advice for this type of thing?  Thanks!

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