So, recently I jumped back into the world of dating after taking a long overdue break. It has been nothing short of an adventure. It has been an interesting run so far with a few weirdos in the bunch. Figured I’d share my experiences so far and the type of dudes I have encountered. (BTW I am not guy bashing because I’m sure there are girls who do the exact same things listed below to guys)
1.The first I’m sweet, then I turn weird and creepy guy
These guys are matched with you, have a nicely written profile, and send a nice first message (something besides, the one worded hey or sup). After chatting for awhile they get all weird and ask you to send them pics, ask what underwear your wearing etc. These are truly weird and creepy guys especially because they seem normal from the beginning and then do a 360 flip. This type of behavior made think: Am I talking to the same guy I was 5 minutes ago? Steer clear of these guys but I guess at some point you are bound to run into them.
2. The Fade Aways
I really hate these guys more than any other type I mention in this post. Basically, you hit it off with a guy and you exchange messages, get to know each other, the convo is flowing, and then silence, nada, nothing, zero. The guy goes fucking AWOL and just stops messaging you. No explanation, no anything just radio silence. Yes, it sucks because you had a good convo, thought you’d exchange numbers, or already did, and the he goes MIA on you. This guy was most likely keeping you around as a second option until he found better and more attractive girl to talk with. It sucks but it is what it is and will always be a part of online dating.
3. The Old School Creep
The dude that keeps visiting your profile but never messages you. Obviously the guy is somewhat interested in you because he keeps taking peeks at your profile. Dude, if you like what you see just message me instead of stalking my profile throughout the course of the day or week. When you message him he does not respond and this leaves you scratching your head. Just get over it and move on.
4. The Old Guys Scoping Out Younger Girls
Really dudes, Really? It’s nice that you sent me a perfectly spelled more than one word or phrase first message but the only problem is you are old enough to be my dad. An age difference of 8 years or greater is too much for me. I am flattered that you took time to message me but it is just not going to work out. I do not want to date someone close in age to my father.
5. The Misspelled Messages
I’m sorry, there is absolutely no excuse for poor grammar or basic spelling mistakes in messages. I hate receieving messages with capital letters in the middle of words or confusing your/you’re If you do not know how to use proper capitalization in your 20s then we should not be having a conversation and you need to re-take English 101. Terrible grammar or spelling will not initiate a response from me and I’ll move on.
This is so ridiculous and frustrating. I swear I have seen the same men pop up in my searches and it sucks. It just shows how there is literally no one where I and there is nothing to here so that could be why there are not many guys coming up.
7. The One Liners
Guys who send out mass messages of hey to amy woman the see on a dating site in hopes of a response. This is so lazy and unpersonable. I hate when men do this because they want the woman to do all of the work and are just plain lazy. if you are not going to take the time to read my profile then I am not wasting my time getting back to you or checking out yours.
8. The Ever Persistent Guy
The guy who keeps messaging you long after you stopped answering his messages or told him you’re not interested. You would think he gets the hint from the lack of response/interest but he keeps flooding your inbox with messages. Sometimes requiring you to block him. These are very annoying guys and if you ever want to land a first date you need to stop.
Best first messages I have received when online dating(exactly as they typed it):
Hi can I be your SD?
No way me too!
You look good, I look good … let’s make this happen
Can I pay you to kiss your feet
I want to get u pregnant
Can we fuck?
Could you be interested in a sugar daddy?
Well if you want to swing by you can I just ordered some chop suey
I’m just guessing but you must get bombarded with messages
Can I massage your feet
Let’s hook up?
If you were a vegetable you would be a cute-cucumber
If you were a triangle you’d be a cute one!